LOVE TO SEE ME CRY

I Am,
I am wondering and fighting..
I wonder if it'll go away..
I hear their voices telling me to keep trying..
I see the reasons to hold on, just out of reach..
I want to outsmart this,
I am wondering and fighting..
I pretend that it's not there..
Your hates above me!!
I feel the blades slice my wrists..
I touch the numb scars of once deep wounds..
I worry that they'll all find out..
I cry over things that have no meaning..!
I am wondering and fighting..
I understand that I need help..
I say all I need is time..
But you just pushed me away!!
I'm not a garbage..!
I dream of a day when I am back to normal..
I try not to stop fighting and give up..
I hope they understand..
But, No one understand,
The problems that I had this time..
They think its my illusions..
That I see you in everyone..
The ghost of you, tortured me..
Forced me to swallowed my own tears,
And proudly you laugh all over me!
But you forgot, One thing you had forgot..
See me.. I'm just a girl..
Who needs your love..
Ya, your love long time ago..
That time you hurt me..
I beg you not to leave..
But still, you left me without mercy..
Yes it's true.. You love it..
You love to see me cry..!!